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Papar, Sabah, Malaysia
Daughter to a lovely parents. A sister/friend/teacher-to-be. Akim's Ucuk.

Monday, December 17, 2012

I Want To be One Of Them...

"I want to be one of them... Is it difficult to understand?"

Christmas is coming. Everyone around me is counting days to Christmas Eve or what-so-ever it is..

How about me? Yes. Before. I was. Like everyone else. But, there is a saying...

"People change." 

And they do. So do me. Well... There are some parts of me that I decided to keep it same. Remain unchanged, or they would never.
(what am I talking about..? fhewwww)

Well... My family and I, had return to our hometown. Where we all belongs. This is the new beginning for us. And as for me, its a big challenge that I would have to face with. In seconds, dush! Everything, changed!

I see things so differently now. People surrounds me, are different. Way too different from me. From the way we sees the world, and most of everything in it. Ohh! No probs! This is how He shows He loves me. Despite my hardships, my faith and believe have now become stronger. Deep inside me, with all Praises to Him... It haven't changed. Not at all.

Most of the time, I spent my day wondering how life would be if Im one of them. At that moment, tears falls down. I felt something... Emptiness. That should explains it. The fear, lost, miss, everything! 

Ohh. How I wish to be one of them...

If and only if Im one of them, I will be a better human. The emptiness, would be filled.

I missed Him. Too much. His love, to them are too much. And I can't never refuse to avoid myself from Him. 

I want to be with Him there. Because I am very sure, He is the one. Here, this Earth and there... Where we all belongs later... All of us. The day will soon come...

But, my journey aren't that easy. Obstacles by obstacles I have to face with. Courage, brave, faith. That are what I need to keep myself stand still. Not influenced by anything that come occur by any mean.

I am now, counting my days, months, or maybe years... To be one of them. I will. One day. I can't wait to give my whole life to Him. The only one. 

All praises to Him... Yesterday, now and forever... 

Until next time, if God wills. Aamin :)
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